parking pass: $50

If I were some sort of architect, engineer, or urban planning person, I'm pretty sure I'd excel at math. Maybe? What? Oh, I guess in Florida that's about as stable a thought as trusting state machines to count a votes regardless of hanging chads. And no, that joke is not old- Florida still sucks and its inhabitants are lower on the IQ scale than Forrest Gump, but nobody's momma is going to screw the school principal in hopes of bypassing 'five measly little points.'

In any case, tell me why our downtown parking garage is by far, the worst structure of modern engineering known to man. Maybe just a simple concession that the people/contractors -or whoever- messed up too much to tear the damn thing down and start over. It's not even enough that the building is poorly built, but the management and technology used to clock in/out the cars are deplorable. Yes, big word- deplorable. English? They suck peppered donkey haunches.

My printout shows that you didn't come in today.

Ok well...here I am! So...I'd like to get out.

My printout says that you never came in, so I can't let you leave.

...Wow..that's weird because I'm pretty sure I AM inside the damn garage. Please press the little button or whatever it is that needs doing so that I can go home and have some delicious pre-packaged diet food.

I can't let you leave since the printout...

WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO GET OUT OF HERE.

That's happened not once, not twice, not even thrice- but more times than I can to recount. Oh, and to my coworkers. Thinking back on this post, sounds like a trivial situation, right? Hmmm well maybe you're better than me.

My stretchmarks are slightly itching, means it's time go watch the rest of Family Guy and wake up early to park in the garage.